The lovely peeps at Falling For Fiction are hosting a "Hookers and Hangers" Bloghop.
The deal is today we post the first line of each chapter and on Wednesday we post the last line. The link above will take you to the post detailing all about it and most importantly all the other lovely awesome people posting their Hookers today! So you should definitely check it out.
Today is those "Hookers" to see how well we hook you in.
These are from my soon to be queried (I hope) novel "Networked", a YA thriller set in the near future about a girl, Devon, trying to find out what happened to her missing, presumed dead, brother.
My First Five Hookers for the Hookers & Hangers Bloghop!
1. I hadn't escaped the Network, exactly.
2. I disconnected, unable to talk to anyone.
3.I struggled to match Dad's pace as he strode toward the school’s main door.
4. I sloped along the corridor, peeking in classrooms as I went.
5. By the final class, Government and Politics, no new idea had magically arrived in my brain like I hoped.
I would love to know what you think, and I mean that genuinely, if you wouldn't read on that's kind of useful information!
Hangers will be up Wed, and I'll be back tonight to check out everybody else's - Yay!
I really love your first hooker - very intriguing!
ReplyDeleteThank you v. much! :)
DeleteThe first couple have me hooked. I'm intrigued in what is the net... and the last one about the idea in your brain oozed voice. Number 3 and 4 weren't as WOW, but they were still interesting. In conclusion - I would read on :) Good job. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you. I agree, 3 and 4 probably aren't as strong - was an interesting exercise for me listing these out and has certainly made me look at them anew! Thank you for commenting!
DeleteI admire anyone who can write in first person.
ReplyDeleteI actually reworked this novel into 1st because close 3rd just wasn't working for me! Thanks for commenting.
DeleteThe first one nailed it for me! Good luck with querying. :D
ReplyDeleteThank you v. much! (Esp for the luck!)
DeleteGreat hookers, thanks for sharing. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you for commenting ;)
DeleteI love the first one! The title of your novel sounds great as well. Good luck querying! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, eek I'll need it ;)
DeleteI really like the first one. Definitely makes me want to read more and find out what the Network is and why this narrator is talking about escaping it! Let me know if I can be of any assistance as you begin querying!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much gosh esp with the querying offer of help, I may take you up on that ;)
DeleteI really liked your first line and your last line. Makes me wonder what the book is about :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, glad those two are working for you!
DeleteI wanted to know what happens next!
ReplyDeleteThank you, that's good to know ;)
DeleteI really like that last one. I can relate!
ReplyDeleteHee, me too, thank you for commenting!
DeleteI would have kept on reading!
ReplyDeleteThank you, that's good to know ;)
DeleteExcellent start to your story! Hooker #1 is awesome! As are the rest ;)
ReplyDeleteThank you very much, especially for running this great bloghop, it's really been interesting to look at these on their own merits.
DeleteI really liked the last one. I thought it had a great voice! Can't wait to see the hangers :)
ReplyDeleteThank you, especially for running this, it's really fun and interesting to join in on!
DeleteThese are great! The story sounds really interesting!
ReplyDeleteThank you v. much!
DeleteI like the second one! It's brief, but that just means there are so many possibilities!
ReplyDeleteThank you, that's good to know ;)
DeleteI love the premise of this story!! The internet hookers really peaked my interests as well.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for commenting!
Deleteexcellent! i feel her awkward tension! really like the first and last ones!
ReplyDeleteThank you very much, interesting to hear those two are going down well ;)
DeleteI went to publish a few lovely people's comments and Blogger rejected them! Am sure I pressed publish :( so if your comment isn't here I am sorry and trying to fix it! I don't know what weirdness happened.
ReplyDeleteThe first one has be knowing that I want to read more and find out what the Network is. The second continues to draw my interest. Great job!!
ReplyDeleteSee ya on Wednesday for hangers.
Thank you, am looking forward to the hangers!
DeleteOhh, LOVE the first one! Definitely makes me want to read more. So intriguing. The last one is great, too :D
ReplyDeleteThank you, glad to know they both work well!
DeleteThe first one is the most interesting for me, which is good if it's the first line of your book! I'm a new subscriber courtesy of this bloghop - it's been great for finding similar blogs!
ReplyDeleteThank you, happy the first one works! I am following you too, it is v. good bloghop helping to find new people.
DeleteThe opener is quite strong, pulling me in to want to know more. What is the Network? That would keep me reading.
ReplyDeleteThank you, very happy to hear that :)
DeleteOne thing to note, the first four all have the same structure (though they are SUPER interesting). I 'verb' and the rest of the sentence. Might want to look just to be sure your sentence structure is varied. Helps with flow and stuff.
ReplyDeleteJust something to keep in mind since you're querying soon! Good luck! I'm so glad I'm follow you now so I can follow your journey :)
Thank you, and thank you for running this bloghop- because without pulling them out and putting them separately next to each other I would never have been able to see the similar opening structure. I will definitely vary it, thank you for the tip and the follow.
DeleteI like #5 the best. And I'm curious what the network is too.
ReplyDeleteThank you, am glad 5 works well!
DeleteI like #1 and #5, great hooks! Thanks for stopping by my blog :)
ReplyDeleteThank you for picking those out and for stopping by here!
DeleteI love these hooks. I'm really intrigued by your plot and it sounds so good. Good luck querying it! :-) Thanks for sharing today and I look forward to Wednesday's post
ReplyDeleteThank you for the good luck wishes, and the comment, much appreciated.
DeleteThese are excellent hooks. I like the first one a lot, but the Network sounds like Division from PUSH, or the District from Hunger Games, or Skynet from Terminator. It's my favorite, but is there a way to make it new? (Even still, I would definitely read on! Looking forward to your hangers!!)
ReplyDeleteThank you for the point and I definitely take it on board. Glad to know you'd read on anyway.
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ReplyDeleteI'd sure read on! The voice is excellent. I'm a sucker for a "looking for a missing person" story!
ReplyDeleteAh me too! Thank you for saying so, tis nice of you to let me know!
DeleteSeems like an interesting concept... reminds me of 'Kimmie66' by Aaron Alexovich (may have spelled that last name wrong...)
ReplyDeleteOooh will have to look it up, thanks for the ref! And the comments ;)
DeleteIntriguing hooks! #1 is my favourite!
ReplyDeleteThank you, glad you like it ;)
DeleteI really like these - great voice, as others mentioned. The first line is definitely a hooker, fascinating!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much!
Delete#1 makes me wonder what the Network is why she wants to escape.Nice job hookin' me:)
ReplyDeleteYay thank you for letting me know!
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